Often when I see clients trust is something that has seemed to dissolve in their major relationships. Infidelity is often a major reason trust is broken in relationships but it’s not the only reason. It could be that your spouse made a life changing financial decision without consulting you. Perhaps your best friend stabbed you in the back. It could also be that you took something valuable from a family member, lied to your partner, or broke promises to your kids…. Trust is something that we take for granted but once its lost it takes a lot to get back on track.
If you have broken trust with someone who is valuable to you, what can we do? Below are some tips on things we can do to rebuild trust that may have been damaged:
Trust is something that takes a moment to lose but could be a lifetime to rebuild…. Take active measures with your relationships to make sure that the latter does not have to be the case.
I have yet to meet a person who has not heard about what has been in the news about the 12 members of a youth football (soccer) team in Thailand who were lost in a cave. For 17 days we have been hearing about fear, the worry, and finally the wonderful news of the successful rescue and the ability for the children to soon be reunited with their families. I found myself tuning in every day, using social media to find live updates, started checking all the media outlets to check the tally as the boys were coming out, and reached out to friends when I heard the news that all 13 were rescued. It touched everyone in many ways and it brought the world together to cheer for something and hope for something better.
The saying goes “You Can’t Pick Your Family”. Our friends are selected by us based on similarities and common interests. But the same can’t be true for our siblings.
For those of you not aware, family therapy (systems therapy) is an approach to counseling that has really taken off since the 20th century. Most of the theorists around this approach to therapy were around during the 1950's to present. In 2017 we lost one of the original members of this approach to family therapy. Salvador Minuchin. He is considered the father of Structural Family Therapy and he was 96 years old.
i had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with Dr. Minuchin over the past several years. What originally started as a secretarial relationship 8 years ago evolved into something so much more and for that I will always be grateful.
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